Picture credit, Lonnie Crotts. |
Table rock 50k sept 26 2015. Leg One.
(as yet incomplete and it reads well enough in this state and i may or may not finish it later. pulp aesthetic is the new varnish.)
what we didnt see in 2015, as seen in October of 2014. Photo credit Lonnie Crotts. |
Friday morning.
My wife had attached a Disney poncho as a last minute
addition to the outside of my pack. It was flimsy and shredded at the seams and
I vowed to never use it.
In pursuit of a rain shell, I stopped at a local outfitting
company before starting the drive to Morganton NC. Wilmington has a couple of
shops and I chose the newer, more expensive spot to begin. They had a
beautiful Marmot for 100 dollars that I liked and posted everywhere were signs
advertising “25% off storewide” and I was excited, asked the attendant if
the jacket was discounted.
“No, I’m sorry. That one’s fresh in the door.”
I left empty handed, hit I-40, and within 20 minutes I hit
rain.
Friday evening.
Six hours later I hit Morganton's historic downtown. I pulled into a
puddled parking spot alongside Catawba brewery for packet pickup and
proceeded to pickup my packet where peter piper picked a pepper .... never mind.
The drive had been a grueling, rain-blind thing with
multiple wrecks and a helluva lot of stop and go traffic. Stressful driving,
white knuckle hours.
I was glad to arrive but the rain persisted and the
light-fade of evening was not far off. I drove the final 30 minutes to the
camp and put on my Disney poncho and walked around the marshy land of Steele’s
Creek Campground to find a spot where my tent might find a slight lift of perch
above the collecting rain. Found a spot, near my choice from last years much
dryer affair, and set up quickly the tent, moved bags and a cooler into the
vestibule. Set up the stove, cooked up my wife’s wonderfully rich and filling
meatsauce pasta. A bit of a tradition, Kas almost always makes me my pre-race
meal and it never fails to warm me up, relax the nerves, and start the mind
thinking about the distance ahead.
My fine rain-protective Nemo tent making its stand on the banks of Steele creek. |
I sporked the last of the sauce into my mouth, collected and
consolidated race things, opened Celine’s Death on the Installment Plan to the continuing
thump of rain.
Being absolutely alone on a rainy night with the
mountain-dark of night beginning to prey on one’s mind can be unsettling to me.
I was alone, I had no service, and the looming depression of previous weeks
began its work.
I fucking started to tear, to cry, then to sob. Terrible
feelings and self-doubt and the
hauntings of my anxiety began to rip at me deeper.
I drove out for a call to Kas, said
hello, heard a quick NPR story which faded to static as I pulled into my
campsite. A few pages of the book, a brushing of the teeth, a check of the
battery powered alarm clock, and I was as close to sleeping well as I ever have
been while camping before a race.
It may have been a perfect catharsis.
It may have been a perfect catharsis.
Saturday, 2:30am.
Some nearby 50 milers are up chopping wood. It is loud and
intrusive and 3 and a half hours before the race. Appalled, I work to reclaim
sleep despite the hacks and bass thuds of logs splitting, rain spitting against
the rain shell of the tent.
Saturday 5am.
The 50 milers are roaming and calling out to one another.
Cars begin pulling in from hotels. Runners sit in cars and stay dry. The rain
has picked back up to a decent pace.
5:30am. The lights of the starting area go up and an
announcement. Wheres my Disney poncho?
I crawl out of the tent onto a saturated and pooling earth.
Bathrooms are always a problem at races the morning of but Table Rock was
different. There was no line, just a wait for the current occupants to finish.
Ultrarunners and their clock-tight bathroom rituals. And all the homemade
pastas of the world converge the nervous pacing hours before the starting horn. Yet everyone sat in their cars listening to radios.
5:44am. Alarm hits and I lay.
Repeat three times. Campstove and instant coffee, hot oatmeal, half a banana,
Vaseline in all the right spots, race bib, and a relatively calm morning before
removing my Disney poncho and heading 125 yards to the start.
6am. Announcements are made and
people gather in various layers of speed ambition, the fastest moving forward.
I worry that I’m underdressed for the rainy day as everyone wears a rain shell.
Im wearing a sleeveless singlet and a neckerchief. Am I fucked? I’m fucked.
I’ll never finish this. If I get in trouble im in the middle fo the fucking
woods. God help me I’m fucked.
Brett runs up and announces
himself literally seconds before he is dq’d for not being present . My spirits
lift. He’s wearing a rain shell. I should’ve brought my Disney poncho. Its
gonna be cold at the summit some 20 miles away.
“START!”
Brett and I bid each each good
luck and strong legs and off I go with the head pack. Hanging in behind the
morning hacks and wheezes and the swishing trample of trail shoes on wet
mountain grass that is such a wonderful sound, we cross the bridge over
Steele’s Creek and began to move through the darkness towards the mountain that
we cannot see.
First wrong turn happens about
mile 1.5 and it is the head group that makes it. Brief, but a reminder that
these things upset many a race effort.
First miles were easy miles.
Passing double track fs road that leads into the first single track and the
churned, chewed red clay of Appalachia. Running on it was sketchy, like running
across red clay that a potter wets, prepares as slip. Grassy roads then roll
and build towards the deeper hollows and higher launches of stone and wood, the
mosaics of rock outcroppings and fallen leaves.
It was light by the first creek
crossing and it was a knee deep cross that got the shoes good and heavy and the
mind reinvigorated. The rain was a patter and one almost anticipated a break in
the clouds, a false hope, but a real one.
AS 1 was 4.8 miles in. everyone
seems to have looked at a course map and knew when to expect these things. I
had not. I was a little lackadaisical about these things. Fucked.
A mile later would prove the more
worthy crossing. One scaled a rock face and across the corner stood Brandon,
the co-RD and a helluva mountain runner himself, who had hoisted a rope across
the gushing rapids. The roar of the water was punk loud and I stepped in up to
my thighs. I was tight, slow, but I held the rope and kept moving across the
fairly strong mountain rapids. For a flatlander, it feels way perilous to make
blind steps across river stones, and it was not a brave or athletic crossing.
Frankly I felt a slight wave of embarrassment as I landed on the other bank.
The course ran across the river
banks and had some fun push-pull of body, climbing and walking, a little
running, and the everpresent beat of rain on head and shoulders. The
temperature was mild, not warm at all, but it was just cool enough to keep my
questioning the cold of the summit and how that intense climb would affect my
body.
Another few crossings of Steele
Creek, a continued downpour, a coupl’a GU gels later, my legs felt good, the
quads alive but not struggling, the core churning a bit strange but whatever,
the mind in a fine meditative space. The day was shaping up to a nice
performance. Not competitive, but an enjoyable push.
We ran up a bit of road and an
out-and-back that led eventually to the upper point of a gravel road. AS 2 was maybe
mile 9. And there was much rejoicing. The volunteers looked at me with concern when
I asked where to go next … I guess there’s this expectation for a runner to
look at a course map before heading into the woods. I turned and started
heading back down the mountain road, gravel crunching every step of the way,
enjoying the fact that I would soon cross the half marathon point.
I don’t remember many specifics
along the way here. I remember stopping alongside the road and relieving my
stomach and cleaning myself with a handful of leaves, but that’s for another
time.
Halfway mark came just around 3
hours. I was making my goal time and I felt good. The next coupl’a miles were a brilliantly challenging trudge
up gravel road to the next AS at the base of the real profile trail.
Photos by Daren Wilz,Composited, mile 26ish of 2015 Table Rock. |
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